Presence

It was through the eyes of a child living in the body of an incarcerated teenager that I realized the true meaning of Christmas.  I use the word realize because I have always known in my heart and in my head that Jesus is the reason for the season; and that it is not all about presents. 

But this Christmas I learned something else.  I really realized exactly what it means that it isn't about the presents.  Because you see it is about the presence.   Not only is it about the presence of Jesus the Christ Child in our traditions and fesitivities.  But it is about the presence of God our heavenly father in our lives.   The presence of God that we can only have through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. 

I learned this because most of the teenagers that I spent Christmas Day with don't have the presence of God in their lives.  And so their Christmas was filled with mixed emotions.  Emotions like lonliness, bitterness, anger,resentment and many more.

I learned this from one sweet,funny,comical girl. Her favorite thing to say to you when you make her mad is "I am taking you off my Christmas list." This girl smiles everytime I see her.  She gets in trouble alot when I visit because when I walk in the room no matter what she is doing she stops and comes over to me or loudly calls me over to her.  She is happy to see me. 

But on Christmas day that wasn't the case there was a quietness about her that day.  She didn't wave or call me over as usual.  She barely even looked up.  I spoke to a couple of the other girls waiting until she called me over to where she was but she never did.  (this wasn't normal she has a habit of interrupting me when I am talking to the other girls and I have to tell her to wait a minute.  She is learning to share.)

She was watching t.v. she said "hi" to me but turned her attention back to the t.v. I tried making small talk.  But it didn't work.  Finnally I asked her what was wrong.  She looked up and said "I didn't get to call my mother because I don't know the phone number."   (Her mother recently moved out of state)  I did not know how to respond.  Finally all I could think of to say was "You can call me."  She looked at me and didn't say a word and then turned her attention back to the t.v.  Again. I didn't know what to say. "I guess that really wouldn't be the same would it?"  I finally asked.  And then she looked up at me.  She smiled.  She reached out and took my hand and said. "Thank you for coming to see me."

In that moment, in that instance I realized what Christmas is all about.  It is about the presence of God in our lives.  In that moment of time I realized that I was the presence of God in the life of that young lady.   

And, that is the way it is; when no one else is there God is there.  We can't see him.  Sometimes when we need it he uses someone, something to show us he is there.  Everytime we visit the house or everytime that the girls come to the mission they see God.  They learn a little more about how much he loves them.  They ask us why we do what we do.  They ask us why we give them shampoo or bring them a Bible or a magazine.  They learn that it is because of the presence of God.

And now I can't wait for the New Year because I know that some how God will provide a way for us to be his presence and we will get to give them the best present of all.  We will be able to tell them how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.